Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
