That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
