hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
