You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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