he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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