Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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