What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
