do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
