I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
