I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
