Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
not ubering you a puppy
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
