the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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