Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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