had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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