someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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