Yo dont text me then not text me
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
