I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I am one with the molecules
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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