Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
