i think my mom watched the whole time
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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