Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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