she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
