Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
