everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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