Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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