I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize