i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Randomize
