And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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