can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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