no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize