i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize