party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize