But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
