I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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