He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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