At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Blood and glitter go together right?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
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