But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Randomize