Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
This is classic penis vs brain.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
