I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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