last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
