so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Randomize
