nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
