why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
accomplished twins. life is a go
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
