I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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