Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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