And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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