he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
