yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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