i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Little spoons don't ask big questions
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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