OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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