okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
