He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
